Family Photo
Ok everyone, I want you to line up in height order. This is going to be so cute! Tall people in the back, and maybe rest your chins on the ...
Pokémon
ASH caught a wild PIKACHU!
Ash: Yes! Finally a Pikachu. We’re going to be best friends forever!
Pikachu: Pika pika!
Ash: We’re never going to leave each other ...
Jeff Arnold
The reviews poured in, but they were not good. Six weeks had passed since Jeff Arnold finished his debut novel. In the ensuing time he bit his nails anxiously; he ...
Twins
It’s not easy having a conjoined twin that’s deaf-mute.
At a Job Interview
ME: Hey, I’m Josh and this is my Siamese twin Fred. We’re applying for the position in accounting.
INTERVIEWER: Does he talk?
ME: Fred isn’t able to speak, but he’s one hell of a number cruncher! So how long have you worked here?
INTERVIEWER: What, is he retarded or something?
ME: No. Deaf-mute.
INTERVIEWER: Oh my God. He just blinked.
In a Bedroom
RACHEL: I’ve never dated a twin before. It’s so… it’s…
ME: Are you okay? You seem bothered by something.
RACHEL: Your brother is watching us.
ME: (laughs) Don’t mind Fred. He’ll stop once he’s done masturbating.
At the Doctor’s Office
SURGEON: The separation procedure shouldn’t take more than a few minutes.
ME: I don’t know. It sounds really painful.
SURGEON: You and Fred are connected at the hair. You’ll barely feel anything.
| Boundary | Heat Gear |
| The Dating Team | Klansman |
| The Coup | Nice Jacket |
| Black Belts | Commencement Speech at My Dog College |
| Pokémon Battle | Letters I Wrote Before I Understood How Letters Worked |
